Listerine and Shame

I've always been ashamed of my teeth. I hate smiling in pictures—there I said it.  When my agent told me I'd booked this commercial, I really thought they had the wrong guy. That could happen right? The casting director called my agent and asked for a different Michael?

Shame is a subtle poison. 

If you've read any of Brene Brown's work you know it's fundamentally a lie aimed at keeping its victim locked in a tight cage of inaction. I was so sure no one would hire me for something like this I almost skipped the audition. I just made funny faces at the callback—anything to distract from one of my longest held insecurities.

So here's what I think I think:

  1. Shame's assessments of my abilities, talents, and limitations— though long standing—are a clever deception.
  2. If I should doubt anything in this world, perhaps it should be the assertion that I don't have what I need, not underlying goodness. #scarcitysux
  3. Having the courage to show up (i.e. try, audition, sing, wait, dance, etc.) diffuses shame and sometimes leads to getting work. 
Michael Castillejos
Michael Castillejos is an actor and musician based in Brooklyn, NY.
www.macastillejos.com
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